Instincts

I have been in a bit of a slump lately.

It is not a terrible one. Not enough to eat a whole jar of Nuttela with a spatula but more then being grumpy about my hair mocking me in the morning. I am no expert but I think it has to do with our move this summer.

For the record I am very excited about living abroad again. I have never been to Japan but I am quite confident it is fantastic. There are obviously a lot of challenges ahead like shipping the dogs and school and house and vehicles and such but I bet in the end everything will work out. Everything always does they say.

Naturally I am sad about having to close my photography business for now and leaving our beautiful Pacific Northwest. Although I will remain NorthWestMommy cause I cannot possibly let Kim Kardashian snag the dang name!

But past few weeks I wake up every night with nightmares. They range from me drawing to loosing Julian in a crowd to leaving the house with my iPhone only 10% charged. It really is not something I have ever experienced before so I am struggling. I find it hard to talk to anyone because I don’t want pity and I also don’t want people to think that I am ungrateful for these amazing opportunities that we are given. I want my family to know I am strong and that this move is not something I don’t want to do. But something deep inside is nagging me, telling me this is not the path I should take.

Do you follow your instincts? Mine have never failed me and I am beginning to wonder if I should maybe rethink everything. Or at least buy a big jar of Nutella…