As you all know I grew up with my grandparents.
On the weekends they often had their friends over, Mr. and Mrs. Kavcic. My grandma used to work with the lady and her husband was a farmer. Good, honest people. They usually arrived after dinner and I would sit at the table while they had coffee and played catch up. I loved eavesdropping on their discussions about politics and economy. Then I would say my goodnights and be send to bed. The game of cards was about to begin.
They would play tarok. It is a very interactive and competitive game and because teams are made up differently each time the banter between players is brilliant. It was at least in our house. I used to sneak out of bed, walk across the long hallway of our old apartment and hide behind the closed kitchen door. And listen. They were so funny and full of life. Not the kind of people I knew, serious and old-fashioned, with strict rules and all around adult and responsible behavior. They laughed and shouted, they teased each other and banged on the table as cards fell down on the antique wood.
It was a very rare time for me to peak into lives of my parents. Sure I lived with them and after my grandfather retired when I was six the three of us were always together. But it was old school parenting. They never played with me tea parties or did crafts. I followed my grandpa around doing things he did or liked. I played by myself. Or went outside to the playground and played with other children. It was different. And sometimes I think that it might have been better.
I often wonder if my son really thinks of me as an adult. Sure he says I am old, a lot. But does he understand the difference between adults and children? Like the other day when he said to me we should punish daddy for being late. Or ignoring my plea to put his socks on for the 13th time. Was I like that? I doubt I would have gotten away with it.
A few weeks ago my husband invited his colleague and old friend whom he has not seen in years over for dinner while he was visiting town. It was close to Little J’s bed time so after we ate I excused us and went upstairs to get him ready for the night. He brushed his teeth and put his PJ’s on and I asked if he wants to go down to say good bye to Daddy’s friend.
From the top of the stairs I heard him say:
“It was nice meeting you. Hope you come back to visit us soon. Good night.”
He pinched some popcorn and came back up. I tucked him in and kissed him good night.
I think my grandpa would be proud.
22 Comments
Twitter: Rsimplelives
“And the beat goes on”.
Very nice!
m.
Mark recently posted.."She works hard for the money"
Twitter: mommyslounge
Pinched some popcorn. Awesome. And I love the shouting from the stairs bit. I can just picturing him doing so. But you an eavesdropping little girl? Too cute.
Janice recently posted..Time To Be A Mother
Twitter: runnermomjen
Aw, Stasha…he gets it. He totally gets it. You should also be proud
xo
Runnermom-jen recently posted..Wide Open Spaces
Twitter: AlisonSWLee
You’re raising him right, Stasha!
Alison@MWT recently posted..Wordless Wednesday: Two Weeks Old
Twitter: littleredhens
Wonderful. He sounds like an awesome kid!
Twitter: babspinfrance
How cute that he wanted to punish Daddy for being late. He sounds like an amazing kid.
Barbara recently posted..Love and acceptance
I admit it, in the age of the old-school parenting there were the adult and children roles much more separated. I won’t think if it was better or worse, but time has changed and we all want a closer connection to our children.
Sonia recently posted..Eine Wochenende in Amsterdam
Twitter: notwifezilla
What a neat glimpse into your childhood, Stasha! I can only imagine a teeny tiny you peeking through the doors as they played.
As for parenting, we do what works for us, right? Somehow we find that balance between how we were raised and what we think is right.
Jackie recently posted..Daddy Does It
wow.. my boy’s are to shy to do such things..
Good job, Little J. !
Mateja recently posted..Something new
Twitter: kindredadventur
I just love love love visiting this space. I love learning about you and getting to know you. I know you have written that you think you are not a writer, but I have to tell you something there is this amazing ease I feel when I visit here and read your stories. Maybe it’s because I enjoy the similarities and differences of our lives or its your amazing perspective on life and the world. Or maybe its that I {swoon} over your dog. I LOVED this story!! I agree with Alison! You are doing a fantastic job. I also think a little old school is a good thing! xoxox -LV
Hee, hee, this makes me giggle b/c at this point with 4, if any adult visitors walk into my home I have a “how dare you not play with my children and give them your undivided attention so I can have a break” attitude. You’ve been warned
TheAumsMama recently posted..Another Lesson Learned The Aums Way
Twitter: GisSilent
I love your story Stasha. It’s fascinating.
Twitter: normalmomally
Be a proud mama.
I have similar memories of listening to the adults and their card games and conversation. Both my mom and my grandparents. It really was rare glimpses into who they really were outside of “parenting”.
Twitter: LizS_B
Gorgeous story! Yes. I think your Grandfather would be proud!! Little J has delightful manners. And pinching popcorn… too cute!
I can just see the little eavesdropping Stasha. Sweet.
Liz recently posted..Reflecting on the Beauty that Surrounds Us
Twitter: beeswithhoney
The playing off cards and shouting and slapping down cards to the table. Sounds like gatherings my parents had at their house on the weekends. Good memories.
I know you’re grandfather would be proud. I’m impressed the little man went to bed so easily.
Bruna recently posted..advice from a teenager
Twitter: ladiesholiday
How touching!
deirdre recently posted..Photo Friday — Turtle
I definitely think he gets it. And I think mine do too, though I am also a different parent than my mother. I think your grandfather would be proud for sure!
Stacey recently posted..Memories
So awesome.
Twitter: mannahattamamma
love this sense of both the connection and the difference – what a sweetie that boy is! I do think you’re right, though, about parenting differences: we were left to amuse ourselves all the time and saying “I’m bored” was greeted by grownups with profound indifference. There was no “oh let me play a game with you/take you somewhere/find you a toy…” And, as you yourself posted here a long time ago: nothing boosts childhood creativity like a healthy dose of boredom!
deborah l quinn recently posted..summer reading
Twitter: momma23monkeys
I love these memories and you shared them beautifully. Did you ever get caught sneaking down the stairs and eavesdropping? It reminds me of my mom’s bridge parties.
I have just imagined all this)) great)
Jessica recently posted..5 Most Popular Events Website Templates
Your stories of growing up always make me smile so wide. Our upbringings were rather similar, at least for the few years that I did live with my grandparents off and on through my childhood. My grandparents used to plan Cribbage every night after dinner. I still remember how grown up and important I felt the first time Papa told me to sit down so he could start to teach me.
I’m certain that you grandparents would be wildly proud of J and of you for the amazing young man you are raising!
Aramelle {One Wheele recently posted..{The Story of Us} Our Song