The hose

My mom always said we are not rich enough to buy cheap.

17 days ago we had new landscaping done. We are now proud owners of 14 trees, 19 bushes and 171 plants. As my son will tell you:  in order for them to grow you need soil, sun and water. Despite popular belief that it never stops raining in Pacific Northwest, August has not had any yet.

In order to give them the opportunity to thrive and as such have the best return into our landscaping investment I have been advised to soak them thoroughly every day. And to do so, Little J and I visited his favorite store, The Home Depot, to purchase a new hose. He instantly fell in love with a lovely bright blue one; because blue is his favorite color. It seemed well made and heavy duty. It also said it was tangle free. I am assuming all these lovely features were reasons it cost $40.

We are proud owners of two 50 feet garden hoses, one which is a home to our beloved little green frog, who was featured in my 365 project. We also have a posh irrigation system that came with the house. Unfortunately, it is at the moment unusable due to cracked pipe and overbooked repairman.  All these facts led me to remove the $40 hose from the shopping cart and replace it with an ugly green vinyl one costing measly $10. Little J was deeply disappointed, but after I promised him a cut from the savings, he agreed we should go cheep.

And with that commenced our daily three hour watering of all things green. Initially we did it together, but kids like mine loose interest quickly and I am again left  on my own. I put my child to sleep, put my winter jacket on ( it might not rain, but once the sun is down, it is cold around here) and stand alone in the dark, watering. It would be quite therapeutic, if it wasn’t for the guilt about wasting all this drinking water (and shoe shopping money), that consumes me. Will I be known as ignorant water waster or tree killer? 

As if all this wasn’t stressful enough, every time I move, even an inch-yes you guessed it: THE HOSE TANGLES UP. By law of nature the knot is the furthest away from me, most probably on the other side of the fence. And by straightening one knot, I create another, and another, and another. Which in return makes my hair grey and my ice cream consumption rise. A girl has to find a way to cope with this, don’t judge!

So in conclusion: my mother was stunning and perhaps because of that she never was considered wise. But apparently when it comes to consumer wisdom, she was spot on. Below graph proves beyond the shadow of doubt : when it comes to hoses you are best to buy posh. I should know.

Also I did not include the emotional damage compensation claim I am likely to file against my Husband. For no other reason then the fact that men are ultimately blamed for everything.

Disclaimer: this post is in no way endorsed by any store, hose maker or my cities water supplier. However donations of cookies are welcome to be send directly to me, in order to assist me with emotional distress this 50 feet of green evil has caused me. Also none of the 14 trees, 19 bushes or 171 plants have been damaged in the last 17 days. Which in itself is a miracle.


This post was inspired and linked to A Mountain Momma’s


26 thoughts on “The hose”

  1. Twitter: chicktuition
    I hope you learned your lesson and will listen to Little J from now on. At least when it comes to hoses. I hope you get some cookies to help with your emotional distress…and that you will want to share said cookies.

  2. I don’t think there are 14 trees, 19 bushes and 171 plants in my neighborhood. But yes, I agree, we should send cookies.

  3. Twitter: NaynaDub
    Cookies are on the way. 😉 The kinks drive me crazy. I have become a master at whipping the hose from where I am standing and making it get the kink out. It’s a skill most only dream about. Good luck getting the watering system fixed!

    1. Twitter: NorthWestMommy
      I want thAt skill. I practise every evening. I sometimes get it, but as soon as flip untangles the first one it creates another one! It will be the end of me, this hose!

  4. Twitter: Postpartumom5
    Seems like you put alot of thought into your investment and return,lol, because ice cream is important 🙂
    I get it “can’t afford to buy cheap”, that’s exactly why I PAY for dish soap and good laundry soap. Plus, I use to work for Ben & Jerry’s in high school, and that no punk ice cream, it’s real cream and no air 🙂

    1. Twitter: NorthWestMommy
      In my eyes you are a celebrity. I never knew anyone this close to Ben or Jerry!

  5. Twitter: amountainmomma
    Thanks for linking up Babycakes!

    So, is the hanging implied, or am I too “its-my-anniversary” drunk to find the connection?

    1. Twitter: NorthWestMommy
      I am scared of that hose. I fear it is making a noose for me behind my back. But I was too affraid to mention it. In case the word got back to the hose. You know…

  6. Twitter: normalmomally
    It does cool off when the sun goes down, doesn’t it?
    I don’t like watering. For many reasons, but hose tangling is high on the list. Good thing the weather will take over for you this fall (probably sooner, than later) and you’ll not have to do it anymore 🙂

  7. There is a way to satisfy your requirements while being frugal. Check flea markets for posh hoses with messed up ends. New ends, in brass or less durable plastic, can be bought on-the-cheap from any of the hardware “giants” (or, probably, even walmart). Very often, only one end of the posh hoses at the flea market will be bad and you can buy them for a couple of bucks. New ends, both, will cost you around $5 so a “DIY refurbished” posh hose can cost less than the $10 cheapie.

    Take it from an old nerd who likes to fix stuff. I also made a single good 100′ hose using a 98 cent plastic coupler (with some silicone adhesive/caulk and some electrical tape) to join two old 50′ hoses one end of each of which was good, and it was the opposite ends so I didn’t have to buy any new ones.

    1. Twitter: NorthWestMommy
      Passing all the information to husband when he returns home…as a pay back I want a nice, homemade posh hose. Thanks Don!

  8. Twitter: kiddothings
    Hahah!! Here…I just handed you a virtual cookie and a tub of Ben & Jerry’s (you can change flavours whenever you like). I can’t stand hoses that are too long and when it gets tangled up and you’re trying to untangle it, you make it worse. I’m stressing myself up just thinking about it.

  9. Twitter: mannahattamamma
    Eh. Fancy hoses tangle too, just in brighter colors. Don’t be fooled by the bling! Okay, yeah, some water isn’t being drunk (except by the trees) but you’re doing the air a lot of good by introducing all those trees into the ecosystem, so I figure it’s kind of an eco-tossup. My mom (a gardener) has one of those wind-up hose things–you wrap the hose around it and then sort of unspool it as you go. Like a ribbon holder, basically.
    Plus isn’t it worth it for the scent of wet earth that happens after you water?

    1. Twitter: NorthWestMommy
      Oh yes. It does smell fresh. Thank you for Giving me green thumbs up! I am supporting my little Eco system ha? I like it, feel like a million bucks now.

  10. LOL, I’ll send you some virtual cookies 🙂 We too got the cheap hose, because we move so often and I’m so tired of buying hoses and leaving them behind. Our cheap hose was awful from the first time I used it. In the store is was solid and coiled, but then once I unraveled it, the hose collapsed on itself and never works well.

    My mom always stressed the difference between cheap and inexpensive, she still does if we use the word cheap in place of inexpensive. And she is right, there is a difference. We bought $5 water guns at Toys R Us (which I think was expensive), but the other option was $15 water guns. And when we got home, the $5 water guns didn’t work at all. So a few weeks later I purchased the $15 one and it is awesome.

    What gets under my skin are these companies that make cheap products. Why can’t they make better products? It seems like a waste of time and money for everyone. Sorry for the rant. I just get upset when I buy something only to find out it is truly representative of its cost.

    1. Twitter: NorthWestMommy
      Rant away! I am with you on this one all the way. Don’t you love it when a brand name gives them the right to fake quality?!

    1. Twitter: NorthWestMommy
      Glad you agree. I have in my mind blamed my husband for some of the mistakes I made in my early twenties. I did not meet him unill years later. But if he was around earlier, I wouldn’t have done them right? See, totally his fault. In fact I should get a new pair of pretty shoes for an awful day I had at work in 1999!

  11. Twitter: JenAnnHall
    My hubby works for Home Depot, so mention them all you want, for the sake of job security and all!

    Who knew which hose to buy could be such a big decision? It’s a long tube for water to flow through. Why so complicated? Seriously.

    1. Twitter: NorthWestMommy
      You Husband has my son’s dream job. Actually I could work there too, as long as it is the outdoor section. Promise we are not eyeing his job 😉

  12. Twitter: Mytimeasmom
    This is why I made my husband install a drip system in our garden. Well actually, I had to help. But no more hose worries.

  13. Twitter: MamaHearMeRoar
    I hope you get a whole truckload of cookies. If we were nearer, I’d throw in some dark chocolate too … if you’re a fan.

    As the for emotional damage compensation claim, I could assist in that, the experienced litigator I am! Too bad my Husband is primarily the chief defendant, hence his name “Sweet Man”.

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