I am spam

They say perception counts.

We went to the playground this afternoon. Mrs V’s and my son were not taking turns like they should, so we threatened to cut the fun short and head home. The boys continued to disobey and we followed through. Some of you will applaud us, some will say we were too tough. I know most moms in my neighbourhood were dialing child services when they saw me walking away from the playground, leaving my screaming three year old behind. I did finally fetch him, but only because I was worried about perception. Honestly I would have sat around the corner and waited for him to come and do as he was told forever. Or at least till I got very hungry.

Why is it so hard these days to be a parent? Most things are easier. I have a luxury or staying home, following my own schedule, being my son’s biggest influence. We are healthy, well and comfortable and if any of those fail, we have a back up plan. Beyond all that, I was raised well and had a great role model to now emulate as a parent. So really it should be smooth sailing.

Unfortunately everybody else has an idea of how to parent my son too. With a help of the media and law, I can get judged at anytime and the world I love and live for can be taken away from me instantly. Which is why I often back down and do things differently from how I want to. Strangely enough, I never seem to have the issues I have with him in public when I do things my way, at home.

Helmets for riding bikes, sunscreen on a cloudy day, never taking eyes of your child when outside the house. My Grandpa is crossing himself in his grave as I type this. Our car did not have seat belts on rear seats. But I understand that bikes are faster, ozone layer is thiner and kids are taken; so I obey. I just wish that I could stop worrying about what others think of my parenting skills. Because I know my son like nobody else.

According to the last fifty emails caught in my spam inbox I am a single Asian Republican male, looking for a mail in bride, Viagra, UGG boots and printer ink. I am pre approved for a re-loadable teen debit card and a house loan. In desperate need of legal services; for both divorce and asbestos problem. Must quit smoking and have lasik surgery. My private jet is ready for me 24/7 and a phone call away. All my problems will go away if I find out what my sun sign is and subscribe to cable. I am also a genius and could be bilingual in ten days.

Somedays I wish my spam was right…

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  1. Posted April 21, 2011 at 12:18 by Marjana | Permalink

    You’ll always be judged in public no matter how and what you do. As long as you stick to the law, everybody can only watch. I don’t know why we’ve created such a fearful society.. fear of falling off the bike, fear of our kids being kidnapped. People used to live more simply only 30 years ago and were happy. We’re restricting happiness this way. There’s a book by Carl Honore called ‘Under Pressure: Rescuing Childhood from the Culture of Hyper-Parenting’. I recommend it for every parent.

    • Posted April 21, 2011 at 19:29 by Stasha | Permalink

      Thank you Maja, I needed that. Will get the book from the library tomorrow. Look forward to reading it.

  2. Posted April 19, 2012 at 04:02 by Iza Trapani | Permalink

    Trust your instincts, Stasha. You are a wonderful Mom. You understand the importance of setting boundaries, and following through on what you say. Many parents today negotiate with their kids and back down consistently, so the children keep pushing. Kids need and want limits. It makes them feel safe. I am sorry you felt pressured to back down. Don’t doubt yourself though.

  3. Posted April 19, 2012 at 05:24 by Natalie | Permalink

    I do hate it that strangers are always judging on how raise our children…I’ve heard crazy stories of people just approaching parents and telling them what they are doing wrong. UGH!